Words That Sound Disgusting to Me

Some words just sound gross to me. Obviously, many words that mean gross things sound gross. Pus, phlegm, smegma -- all these words have a sort of squishy, fetid sound to them that are good matches for what they mean. There's something about all those "m"s and "p"s and "s"s together ... it's vaguely onomatopoeic. If I sat and watched pus burst from a sore (and why not?), I wouldn't be surprised if it actually made the sound "pus!" as it emerged.

On rare occasions, in fact, a word with a disgusting meaning isn't itself a disgusting-sounding word. My 7th-grade Latin teacher told us that there was once a poll of non-English speakers in which they were asked what English word sounded the most mellifluous. The non-English speakers picked the word "diarrhea" as being the nicest-sounding word without having any idea what it meant. And it's true -- if you try to separate it from its meaning, it has a nice sound to it. "Diarrhea." Say it with me now: "Diarrhea." Roll the "r." "Diarrrrhea!" Shout it from the rooftops! "Diarrrrrrhea!!"

But I'm more interested in words that I find gross but don't necessarily mean something disgusting -- words that are just unpleasant to me for some other reason, or for some unknown reason. These are words that I could use in polite company, but I refuse to, because pronouncing them makes me feel just a tiny bit ill.

In this respect, the opposite of "diarrhea" is "moist." (Only in this respect -- in most respects they go together quite well.) There's just something so unpleasant about "moist," and it's only partially due to its definition. I've talked to a lot of people who are with me on this one, so I'm pretty sure it's not just me. Commercials sometimes use "moist" to describe things like brownies. When I hear it, I don't think of brownies -- I think of stepping barefoot into deep, dense, dark, smelly swamp sludge. I don't think of this when I hear synonyms like "wet." I don't know why "moist" does this to me -- maybe those "s"s and "m"s again.

One of my least favorite words in the world is "panties." I feel like it's word that is used in two main arenas: Little girls' underwear and the sexual fetishes of men. You tell a little girl to put on her panties. And men get excited about women's panties. Ick, ick, ick. These are two worlds that should always be kept as separate as possible. In fact, I'm all for creating a separate language for sexual stuff -- Esperanto isn't being used much these days, and I'm sure it has some words we could use. (I looked it up and the Esperanto word for "panties" is "kalsano." I can handle that.) Maybe this is why women go crazy for foreign men -- it's better not to know what sexually aroused men are saying.

To a lesser extent, I'll never feel comfortable with calling my wife "baby." I realize it's meant innocently, as a term of endearment that evokes the affection people have for babies. But when it's said in a sexy way, I don't know, it just feels icky to me. Maybe I'm too literal, or too prudish, or whatever. Regardless, when I say "baby," I mean a very small and young person, and nothing else.

I recognize that all these are kind of dumb, weird, and maybe even wrong-headed reasons to hate these words. And that's kind of the point here: All three of these words don't really deserve the associations I've tied to them, but regardless, those associations are in my brain and they ain't leaving. Anyone else have a word that they really don't like, for weird or vague reasons?